it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My day in three words: secret purse cake
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
