Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
