forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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