Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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