How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
