New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
