Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
