I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
