Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
