Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
