Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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