singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
