Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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