Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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