At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
3 2 1 whiskey
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize