never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize