i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
My pussy is not your playground.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
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walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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