so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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