the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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