At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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