what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
