How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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