Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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