You can't motorboat a personality
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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