Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize