Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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