Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
