I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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