I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Randomize