? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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