And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
