did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I have already put on my inside pants.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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