That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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