don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
