thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
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