I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
