In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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