he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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