Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
