i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I am midnight drunk by noon
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
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