I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
