I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize