I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
