we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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