Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
