So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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