We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
only you would photoshop your dick
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
