Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
