he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
