There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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