I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
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Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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