Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
